Saturday, July 27, 2013

Lessons from the playground: Biting tongues,lying & gossiping

So, This week I have I keep thinking about biting our tongues, Only saying nice things, Lying, and treating others as you want to be treated. And, Most of this came from a trip to our Local Sonic playground with our boys.
I was raised and taught the following:
Watch my words, 'Cause words can harm.
Speak with kindness
Think before I speak
Treat others as you would like to be treated
Lying- disrespectful & comes back to haunt you
Gossip isn't nice!

Truly, these are very simple ways of thinking and being raised. Honestly it should not be that hard ..........................Right?!?!?!?

But now days this seems so far from what so many do.
Lie about how we are doing, lie about what is happening, lie about our plans, Lie to our bosses to get out of work, lie to friends to get out of doing things, lie to pretty much everyone about everything.
I truly do not understand why Lying has become such the norm?
I try my very best to tell the truth in what ever I say,
There might be moments that I will not saying things to not hurt others, but I wouldn't lie.

Ok, so here is my story from tonight's Sonic trip.
So, We decided that it was time whether or not I was sick (and man I am really trying to get over it so bad!)
to get the kids out of the house, get rid of the cabin fever and do something.
So, Friday sonic play night. Sadly, its the only place we have in town that truly has a play ground, a real out side, in the sun, in the heat, play ground. And the kids were having a blast! (go Figure my baby b who hates sand at the beach is fine with sand at a play ground! UGH!)
Well, we get there and a few others are there, no biggie, its not like there are big kids so I was all okay!  the kids run and play we order the food, lil Reason is sitting in a bumbo just a cooing at daddy, and I'm running wild with the twinks. We are all having fun! And next thing I know........Here comes a woman, with 2 kids, one is around 1-2 years old and the other looks to be about 6 ish........... well she knows another couple at the play ground. NO Biggie again! right? WRONG, So as we are trying to just enjoy this time, she is all blabbing to the people about her life, her lil one with her is not hers but shes stuck raising him, shes enjoying it but made her realize she missed so much of her own kids lives, the other couple is talking about the 2 yr old they have with them is a great gran, and blah blah. and all the TMI is going on and on and on.
So, lets pause for a moment,
when I am out and about, I try not to talk in public about personal matters, I am not going to be on a cell or talking in person about things that others are not needing to know............. BIG PET PEEVE of mine.....
So This was already putting a small damper on our evening out..........
Well, as shes running down all the family problems, she mentions the older kid is A.D.D blah blah, and a bunch more, well........ I'm watching my kids, Well, isn't that what a parent should be doing? I mean Yes I might be a lil over board being that there isn't a gate to keep them corralled in the place and the play ground is rather high, and the fence around it with my luck the boys could squish through if they really wanted to............ So, I'm watching, and I see her kid just throwing sand all over my babies. She........ is still talking....... not watching and when she does see him , she sits there and hollers hey, quit throwing sand, (mean while that's not when he is doing it to my kids) Hubby is feeding lil Reason....... so, we are trying to hurry up, we had already been there a while and well, we knew the kids were not going to eat as long as they knew they could be playing, even with all the falls, cuts, scraps, bleeding and what not's they had been having and doing. So it continues and continues with her kid, and shes still not doing a thing and not watching, why? cause shes more into talking about her her family, her sister, her daughter, blah blah...........
So, Finally We get the kids and try to start packing it up, well now I'm cleaning the kids, and trying to get sand out of their ears, eyes, faces, mouths, hair, shirts, every small crevice it could be in from the child throwing it on them....... And out of no where, here comes one of the most annoying questions from her! OH all boys, so are you going to keep trying for a girl. THANK GOODNESS My husband answered! Nope, we are done. and shes all well that's a shame.
So, Question, Why do people think it is there business to say oh I bet your done, or Are you going to keep trying, or wow what a group or what ever?!?! Where is it a strangers business, or even family or a friends business to ask these kinds of questions?!?!
Any who, So, this is where I have so many issues.
Why do parents not watch their kids closer?
Why do parents think that screaming from the sidelines will discipline or change the manner a kid behaves?
And when did parents really become so lazy, as to not want to be active in a child's life?
I am not one to want to sit on the side lines, Not if it comes to anything.
Why not want to be active in a child's life? if its correcting bad behaviors? or praising them ? or even if its literally running right beside them? When did we as parents truly decide to NOT be an active figure in our  babies lives?
I am a believer in the spare the rod spoil the child, meaning if you do not discipline, they will just pretty much run wild.
And the lying. Well, I have had several conversations lately with friends and "family" making me wonder why and when did lying become the thing to do?  People do not like being lied to. it offends us, hurts us and really can kill any relationship you have with someone. It ruins friend ships, and ruins trust and bonds that should not be broken in families too!
And since we are on the subject of lying, what is the point in talking to me, and saying stuff and acting like you like me or my husband, just to turn around and say, hey, oh my her husband is so stupid and so this and so that??? whether or not you are family or a friend, that is so two faced! I'm sick of it. and it has permanently ruined some relationships I have.
People are missing out on My children's lives due to lying, back stabbing, sabotaging, being blinded and of course being two faced.
Nothing that is wrong with you mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually or in any form or fashion makes this acceptable to me!!!
My Children are my world. What I do, what others do or say, will make the difference in them.  And, I refuse to let anything BAD be in their lives.
Irony, to me is that They know, Kids know if you are real or fake....... they feel it, its instinct when they are little. And when I stop and think about we can drive any where and see anyone and they are fine but when we head towards certain people when we did go to see them..... every single time, they would act out on the way there and get physically ill! That should of been a sign to begin with! let alone when they usually didn't want to kiss hug or say bye or even welcome them into the place we were.
I know my subjects are just running into each other, and nothing is making sense really, but.............. this is the thing...............
God knows, God sees, and God hears.
No, he isnt' Santa LOL, but its true.
So, Instead of being rude and hateful tonight at the play ground............ We just packed up and left. it was best for everyone in my opinion. And I tend to do this lots.
In stead of lying, Speak the truth! Try it, It wont hurt I promise
And............. now, I challenge you to get out and do something with your kids/family/husband today. even if its just walking down the street holding hands. Show your family you love them! That they matter, Put the phone away for a few hours. and concentrate on your loved ones. DONT miss out on time with them. Today is a gift, use it wisely for tomorrow is NOT promised! Dont take your family for granted!!!
Sorry for the rants and ramblings of a sick and sleep deprived mommy!


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